This is a book written by a person who was sexually assulted while largely unconscious. In all terrible cases of sexual assults, this may seem like the least worst kind, and yet this book talks about how even in this case, the terrible act starts to take its toll on the author. I would highly recommend reading this book for all.
Some themes in this book
- There is a group of behavior to which a victim is supposed to conform. And if you do not conform to that, the lawyer on the other side will use that as proof and attack your behavior. This is all done in the name of being fair under the law and giving the accused the benefit of doubt.
- The “predator” also falls under a certain group of behavior, and if they do not conform to that, they will be seen as less severe and less of a criminal.
- What is consent, and how does that work when both parties are under the influence of alcohol or drugs that they both voluntarily took? – the conclusion is that the conscious version of the person who decided to consume the substance will be responsible for the act they perform after they are under the influence of the substance. If you are not sure whether you will behave and whether you might sexually assult someone after you drink, just don’t drink, or ask a friend to pull you back when you do.
- There are a lot of aspects of the current US legal system that do not support the victim as well as they could’ve. And the burden again falls upon the victim to know those pitfalls. E.g. You cannot easily say you forgive the assaulter in any way because that might just be used to justify a lighter penalty for the assaulter, which you may not want to see.
- Ways to recover afterwards. Getting support.